Do n’t blame me , charge Mattel .
It’s been some time since the release ofBarbie,but I’m not over all the hilarious and uplifting quotes from the film. Here are my top 41 favorite quotes, including the funniest roundup of Ken lines, and Gloria’s heartwarming and powerful monologue.
1.“Every night is girls' night.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
2.“How can I be a fascist? I don’t control the railways or the flow of commerce.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
3.“There are no multiples of Allan. He’s just Allan.” —Narrator (Helen Mirren)
4.“She’s not dying, she’s just having an existential crisis.” —Gloria (America Ferrera)
5.“I’m a liberated man. I know crying’s not weak.” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
6.“Midge was Barbie’s pregnant friend. Let’s not show Midge, actually. She was discontinued by Mattel because a pregnant doll is just too weird.” —Narrator (Helen Mirren)
7.“By giving voice to the cognitive dissonance required to be a woman under the patriarchy, you’ve robbed it of its power.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
8.“So you’re like ‘Barbie’ Barbie? Like a professional bimbo?” —Sasha (Ariana Greenblatt)
9.“That’s because they’re dream houses, motherf*cker.” —President Barbie (Issa Rae)
10.“I’m just Ken.” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
11.“No, no, no, no. I’m not a sugar daddy. This is Sugar, and I’m her daddy.” —Sugar Daddy Ken (Rob Brydon)
12.“Shredding waves is much more dangerous than people realize.” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
13.“All of NSYNC? Allans!” —Allan (Michael Cera)
14.“You’re kenough.” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
15.“We mothers stand still so our daughters can look back and see how far they’ve come.” —Ruth (Rhea Perlman)
16.“To be honest, when I found out the patriarchy wasn’t just about horses, I lost interest.” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
17.“Oh, look, a construction site. We need that good feminine energy.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
18.“You should heal up in no time. Actually, in the time that it took for me to say that sentence, you healed.” —Barbie (Hari Nef)
19.“Please call me mother.” —Mattel CEO (Will Ferrell)
20.“Women are at the foundation of this company! There was a female CEO in the ’90s and then another one…at some point. So that’s two right there!” —Mattel CEO (Will Ferrell)
21.“We have to always be extraordinary but somehow we’re always doing it wrong.” —Gloria (America Ferrera)
22.“I will beach both of you off at the same time!” —Ken (Simu Liu)
23.Walking away “Sublime!” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
24.“Her ghost keeps an office on the 17th floor.” —Mattel CEO (Will Ferrell)
25.“You guys are not doing patriarchy very well.” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
26.“You have to be their mommies but not remind them of their mommy. Any power you have must be masked under a giggle.” —Gloria (America Ferrera)
27.“I can do the splits. I have a funky haircut and I smell like basement.” —Weird Barbie (Kate McKinnon)
28.“You’re so beautiful.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
29.“I’d like to see what nude blob he’s packing under those jeans.” –Weird Barbie (Kate McKinnon)
30.“I do not have a vagina and he does not have a penis. We have no genitals.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
31.“I’m here to see my gynecologist!” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
32.“Barbie is a doctor, and a lawyer, and so much more than that.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
33.Screaming “FLAT FEET!” —Barbie (Hari Nef)
34.“Fine, get cellulite. I don’t care.” —Weird Barbie (Kate McKinnon)
35.“Does the label ‘long-term long-distance low-commitment casual girlfriend’ mean nothing to her?” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
36.“You can tell them you’ve never seenThe Godfather, and that you’d love them to explain it to you.” —Gloria (America Ferrera)
37.“I’m trained to stand confidently here.” —Ken (Ryan Gosling)
38.“I’m sensing some kind of entendre here…and it appears to be double.” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
39.“You have to answer for men’s bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you’re accused of complaining.” —Gloria (America Ferrera)
40.“Do you guys ever think about dying?” —Barbie (Margot Robbie)
41.And, finally, this list wouldn’t be complete without Gloria’s big speech to Margot Robbie’s Barbie. It’s too hard to pick my favorite part, so I’m just gonna give you the whole, glorious thing:
" It is literally unsufferable to be a cleaning lady . You are so beautiful , and so smart , and it kills me that you do n’t think you ’re good enough . Like , we have to always be over-the-top , but somehow we ’re always doing it wrong . You have to be thin , but not too thin . And you may never say you desire to be thin . You have to say you desire to be healthy , but also you have to be fragile . You have to have money , but you ca n’t involve for money because that ’s crass . You have to be a boss , but you ca n’t be mean . You have to moderate , but you ca n’t squelch other hoi polloi ’s idea . You ’re supposed to love being a female parent , but do n’t talk about your nestling all the deuced time . You have to be a career cleaning lady but also always be looking out for other mass . You have to answer for military personnel ’s bad behaviour , which is insane , but if you point that out , you ’re accuse of complain . You ’re supposed to stay pretty for men , but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other woman because you ’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood . But always stand out and always be grateful . But never draw a blank that the scheme is rig . So detect a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful . You have to never get old , never be crude , never show off , never be selfish , never light down , never fail , never show fear , never get out of line . It ’s too hard ! It ’s too confounding and nobody gives you a medal or state thank you ! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything incorrect , but also everything is your fault . I’m just so banal of keep an eye on myself and every single other cleaning woman bind herself into knots so that people will like us . And if all of that is also dependable for a wench just representing cleaning woman , then I do n’t even cognise . "
