" The number of pats on the back I get from bon ton for doing this is tempestuous . "
Whatever your gender, you probably feel like there are many stereotypes ascribed to you that simply aren’t true. So Redditoru/TarCorROasked, “Men of Reddit, what’s one stereotypeabout masculinitythat you wish would disappear, and how does it affect your life?” Here’s what people said.
1.“That men should be the ones to make the first move. Introverts and socially awkward men suffer from this common standard.”
2.“I am not a fan of the idea that toughness and strength are tied to violence. I’m from a military family full of martial artists, and honestly, the older I get, the less cool it all seems. I was very lucky to have an uncle who is one of the toughest people I’ve ever met. He’s a big grizzly bear guy with an incredible pain tolerance, and he’s extremely physical, but I don’t think he has ever thrown a punch in his life. Having someone like him as a role model growing up — someone with a gentle soul who also fit the masculine archetype — makes me feel extremely blessed.”
— atomic number 92 / Misterstaberinde
3.“That we’re messy. Seriously, I constantly have to remind my girlfriend to put her stuff away.”
4.“There’s a stereotype that men are sex-crazed, and it’s all we think about 100% of the time. But in reality, sometimes we want to take things slow in a relationship.”
— u / Mercian - Geezer
5.“That we shouldn’t enjoy hobbies people define as effeminate — such as baking, gardening, textiles, stuff like that.”
6.“That it’s somehow strange for a man to be close to their parents, especially his mother. Just because a man is close to his parents and mother doesn’t mean he’s a ‘mama’s boy.'”
— Anonymous
7.“That we don’t enjoy fruity drinks. I’ve been made fun of for ordering them. Like, I can handle straight liquor fine, but it tastes horrible to me, so I love cloaking it in fun drinks. It’s really weird the number of people who only drink beer or ‘manly’ drinks who look down on fruity cocktails. Even women do it. Give me that Svedka strawberry-lemonade infused vodka with raspberry juice and a splash of coconut rum any day of the spring/summer, and I’m a happy guy.”
8.“Being expected to be able to step up in really scary situations when you are scared shitless yourself and don’t want to either.”
— atomic number 92 / Nolan-
9.“That we can’t take care of kids. The number of pats on the back I get from society for doing basic childcare for my own kids is wild.”
10.“We are not uninterested if we don’t have sex on the first date.”
— uranium / JohnMcClanesPenis
11.“That having a penis means I’m automatically into the exact same hobbies, behaviors, and interests as other people with penises. I don’t like sports or cars. I like keeping my house clean. All people are different.”
12.“That we must be made of stone 24/7. Men should be allowed to cry rather than be judged or mocked for seeming weak.”
— uracil / Ryaffus
13.“That men don’t enjoy things that are comfortable or relaxing. Man, I love soaking in a hot bath.”
14.“I am NOT babysitting my children. They are MY children!”
— atomic number 92 / GoblinNumber467
15.“That we have noemotionsand/or we always have to be the emotional rock. The truth is that we need emotional support, too.”
— u / GandalfTheJaded
16.“Questions like, ‘Why are you wearing pink? You’re a guy.’ ‘Why are you drinking anything that’s not a beer? You’re a guy.’ ‘Why are you in this pottery class? You’re a guy.’ ‘Why did that movie make you tear up? You’re a guy.’ Just about every guy gets questions like these on a regular basis that they probably don’t even notice anymore.”
17.“Asking for help with mental health seems to be more of a taboo for men (in my experience). I have reached out so many times over the last 15 years and have been told to ‘get over it,’ ‘man up,’ and ‘don’t think about it.’ As a result, I have been dealing with my issues on my own since then and sometimes feel like no one really gives a damn about what I’m going through.”
— dannymazda1
18.“That we don’t know how to cook. I NEVER understood this one. Most of the men in my family cook, and as a kid, I was always encouraged to cook when I showed interest in the kitchen. Yet the stereotype persists…”
