" My neighbor had her daughter start shaving her leg and ARMS at SEVEN years old because ' she ’s Italian . ' I was so appalled . "
Here are 15 of their top responses:
1.“The idea that women over 30 should try to keep up with the clothing and beauty trends the girls in their teens and 20s are into.”
" If you want to , go forrader , but if we all look back at our mom when they were in their 30s , their clothes , makeup , and hair style were kind of outdated and ' uncool . ' I ’m not 25 anymore , and I desire to wear what I want to wear out , whether it ’s trendy or not ! "
— omgitsaclaire
2.“The push to look your cutest at the gym, especially with matching workout sets.”
" I ’ll just wear my old leggings and T - shirt , thanks . "
— chak777
3.“To the people [who say] you can ‘opt out’ [of beauty standards] — good in theory, but there are people holding you to some of these standards. Ask any woman of color in particular about their experiences with ‘standards’ regarding their hair and their employment status, for example.”
" Opt out ? Where are we gon na work ? ( Particularly , but not define to when you ’re starting out . ) Because ' opting out ' means cutting the pool of jobs to an even smaller number of theory .
Black girls learn this very young . It ’s why my first few payroll check went to haircare as a teen . You do n’t have a choice when you ’re literally tell your well - conserve rude hair is ' wild ' and could be more ' professional . ' It is certainly not unique to me . Most mordant women have heard exchangeable things at some point in their lives .
( Women , in general have this job regarding their look . I do think it ’s heightened for POC who do n’t shine within the ' normal standards ' of beauty , however . ) "
— vibrantorc46
4.“I get asked all the time if I’m going to cover my gray. I’m nearly 60. I’ve earned my gray. But now I see where, being older, I’m treated very differently. Like, ‘Wait, you were younger once?'”
" Well , hell yeah , and I did things you only woolgather of . "
— gneistorowich
5.“I call [it] ‘pretty fat’ — big butt, big boobs, and big thighs. If you got a gut and not a butt, you are ‘ugly fat.'”
" As is painfully obvious for those of us who are NOT ' pretty fat , ' it ’s frustrative and so disheartening . "
— mollykin1015
6.“My neighbor had her daughter start shaving her legs and ARMS at SEVEN years old because ‘she’s Italian.’ I was so appalled.”
" Please do n’t instill these [ wild ] estimation in your children . "
— janemlane
" An ex-husband - friend of mine started shaving her daughter ’s branch for her at old age 10 , not because allege girl want to plane her legs and require for help , but because my ex-husband - friend saw hair on her legs and insisted she shave it off . This poor youngster did n’t care at all about leg hair until her mom - pretend her for it and made her remove it . Fuck . That . Noise . "
— keepintabs
7.“I worked in the beauty industry for over ten years, specifically selling cosmetic products. Believe me, I have some stories! But after thousands of interactions with mainly women, one of the things that has stuck with me is how many times I would have a customer come in to try makeup or get a service and APOLOGIZE for not wearing makeup or looking ‘put together.'”
" I would then proceed to reassure them that I was not judging , and what ’s the point of try physical composition if you already had it on ? Ladies , we need to turn back apologizing for being our bona fide self and nip this whole peach measure in the ass once and for all ! "
— zilo6180
8.“It’s not just teens, it’s KIDS who are 9, 10, 11 following [ridiculous] TikTok trends. It’s common for teens to experiment with skincare, but no 9-year-old should be buying jade rollers, tightening serums, and honestly, no one under 30 needs any damn wrinkle cream.”
" I have figure some shorts on YouTube where there are 11- and 12 - year - old showing off their skincare routines , and they are using ten product and direct 45 minute . It ’s candidly sick , and I finger that we ’ve gone backwards as a society and have failed if literal CHILDREN feel like they have to have perfect skin and hundreds of dollar deserving of skin care . parent : contain buy your small fry this diddley , too . No 9 - year - sure-enough needs a $ 45 hydrochloric Zen face masquerade party , for ass ’s sake . "
— morgan_le_slay
9.“My very good friend won’t be seen with short sleeves because she doesn’t like her arms and will only exit her apartment if her hair and make-up are perfect. SHE IS 94 YEARS OLD.”
" When does this absurdity end ? ! ? "
— karenhaasek
10.“The idea of girls needing to not have scars! It makes me hate having to wear ankle socks when it’s hot outside because I have scars on my ankles from surgery I had so I could walk better.”
— daynam4b6e28fa3
11.“When I was a girl, my grandmother said I had perfect legs because, in her time, you should be able to hold a knife between your thighs. That was a beauty standard at one time.”
— marvelouswolf87
12.“Silver hair is now ‘cool’ on a woman, but I am 50, and my hair isn’t going gray or silver, just getting to be a more dull, dishwater brown/blonde. So apparently, I’m not even aging in the right, trendy way.”
— popculturemama
13.“You can be fat, but in addition to being ~proportional~, you also have to have a skinny face. Absolutely no double chin.”
— tamelessghoul
14.“It’s all so very true, and shoved in our faces from such a young age. At Christmas, I worked at a Santa’s Grotto, and one little girl, when Santa asked what her hobbies and interests were, said ‘skincare.’ She was eight. EIGHT.”
— emmak26
" There are acne products made for adolescent . I used anti - acne products as a teen , and that ’s fine . What these kids do n’t necessitate is expensive eye cream , retinol , spot correctors , etc . , that have dynamic ingredients stand for for adult skin . "
— panda_13
15.And finally: “I follow an ex-coworker on IG who has young daughters — like seven and five years old — and in every picture of the daughters she posts, they both have a full-face of makeup on. And it’s been like that for several years, for the older one especially.”
" The mother wears a full - brass of makeup too , and while there is no problem with grown women wearing makeup ( it ’s your face , girl , do what you want ) , I am so distressed by these super vernal girls growing up thinking the only way they seem ' somewhat ' is to wear plenteous amounts of makeup .
( Disclaimer : I am not a mum , but I also do n’t envy parents having to peach to kids about makeup and soundbox image and all that in today ’s societal environment . ) "
— thisisembarassing
Note : Some responses have been edited for length / clarity .
The National Alliance on Mental Illness helpline is 1 - 888 - 950 - 6264 ( NAMI ) and provides info and referral services;GoodTherapy.orgis an association of mental health master from more than 25 countries who corroborate efforts to reduce damage in therapy .
